What You Need to Know

It is important to know that you are not alone in your grief. Below is a letter from Diane and Richard Nares, who lost their son to leukemia.

Dear Friends,

We too, are parents who have lost a child. There is no simple word in our language to describe how we all feel. After losing our beautiful son, Emilio, to leukemia four years ago, a friend wrote in a letter, “Your Pain is as great as your Love.” To this day, this simple statement remains one of the most powerful examples of how profound this loss is.

We wish we could tell you that the pain goes away. It doesn’t, it just changes. One day, you begin to notice that it is a little less intense and it comes a little less often. One day, you begin to notice that you are smiling, rather than crying, when you speak about your child.

Right now, speaking about your child can be excruciatingly difficult. The lump in your throat keeps getting in your way, and breathing seems to be the most difficult feat in your day. Grief comes and goes, like an overbearing wave crashing on the shoreline, rolling in and out, slowing leaving, yet always returning.

We would like to share some thoughts with you:

Breathe deeply, as best you can.
Surrender, this loss is so much bigger than you are.
Embrace your faith and feel God’s arms wrapped around you, guiding you through your day.
Remember, we all grieve differently and in our own time frame.
Let yourself cry…
Take many walks.
Embrace your animals; they are incredibly healing.
Rest, rest, rest.
Be ever so gentle, kind, loving and giving to yourself right now and let others be ever so gentle, kind, loving and giving to you.
Your family and friends love you and are at a loss for words. By letting them do something special for you, they will also be helping themselves.
Remember that Bereavement Groups and Counseling are always here for you and are very safe places to be. Comfort comes from knowing that others know exactly how you feel.

God Bless you all, and know that we are here for you.

– Diane & Richard Nares
Bereaved parents of Emilio